Taking some time

I’m going to practice what I preach, and not write.

I’m going to practice what I preach, this week, and not write a full article. I’ve had a stressful and busy few weeks, including needing to spend some extra time with the family (nothing scary or earth-shattering – we just needed some family time), and I think the best thing for me to do today is not spend time writing an article. Let me point you instead at some I’ve written in the past.

On self-care:

On security:

On trust:

Keep safe, and look after yourself, dear reader!

9 tips for new home workers

Many workers are finding that they are working from home for the first time.

I wrote an article a few months ago which turned out to be my most popular ever, called My 7 rules for remote work sanity (it’s also available in Japanese). It was designed for people who are planning to work remotely – typically from home, but not necessarily – as a matter of course. With the spread of coronavirus (Covid-19), many workers are finding that they are working from home for the first time, as companies – and in some cases, governments – close offices and require different practices from workers. Alternatively, it may be that you suddenly find that schools are closed or a relative becomes ill, and you need to stay at home to be with them or care for them. If you are one of those people – or work with any of them – then this post is aimed at you. In it, you’ll find some basic tips for how to work from home if it’s not something you’re used to doing.

1 Gather

In order to work from home, you may need to gather some infrastructure pieces to take home with you. For many of us, that’s going to be a laptop, but if there are other pieces of hardware, then make sure you’re ready to bring them home. If you don’t have a laptop normally, then find out what the rules are for using your own devices, and whether they have been changed to account for the period when you’ll be working from home. Download and install what you need to do – remember that there are open source alternatives to many of the apps that you may typically be using in the office, and which may provide you with a sufficient (or better!) user experience if you don’t have access to all of your standard software.

2 Prepare

What else do you need to do to make sure everything will work, and you will have as little stress as possible? Making sure that you can connect to work email and VPN may be important, but what about phones? If you have a work-issued phone, and it’s the standard way for colleagues or customers to contact you, then you may be OK, as long as you have sufficient coverage, but you may want to look at VoIP (Voice over IP) alternatives with your employer. If you have to use your own phone – mobile or landline – then work out how you will expense this and with whom you will share this information.

3 Agree

If you have been told that you may (or must) work from home by your employer, then it is likely that they will be providing guidance as to what your availability should be, how to contact colleagues, etc.: make sure that any guidelines are plausible for you, and ask for clarity wherever possible. If you are having to work from home because of family commitments, then it’s even more important to work out the details with your employer. Rules to support this sort of situation vary from country to country, and your employer will hopefully be aware that their best chance of maintaining good output and commitment from you is to work with you, but if you don’t come to an agreement up front, you may be in for a shock, so preparatory work is a must.

4 Educate

Just because your employer has agreed that you should work from home, and has agreed what your work-time should look like, it doesn’t mean that your boss and colleagues will necessarily understand how this change in your working life will impact on how they relate to you, contact you or otherwise interact with you. Let them know that you are still around, but that there may be differences in how best to reach you, when you are available, and what tasks you are able to perform. This is a courtesy for them, and protection for you!

5 Video-conference

If you can, use video-conferences for meetings with colleagues, customers, partners and the rest. Yes, it means that you need to change out of your pyjamas, brush your hair, get at least partly dressed (see some of the tips from my semi-jokey seasonal post The Twelve Days of Work-life Balance) and be generally presentable, but the impact of being able to see your colleagues, and their being able to see you, should not be underestimated. It can help them and you to feel that you are still connected, and make a significant positive impact on teamwork.

6 Protect

During the time that you are working from home, you need, if at all possible, to protect the workspace you will be using, and the time when you will be working, from encroachments by other tasks and other people. This can be very difficult when you are living in a small space with other people, and may be close to impossible when you are having to look after small children, but even if it is just room for your laptop and phone, or an agreement that the children will only come to you between television programmes, any steps that you can take to protect your time and space are worth enforcing. If you need to make exceptions, be clear to yourself and others that these are exceptions, and try to manage them as that, rather than allowing a slow spiral to un-managed chaos[1].

7 Slow down

One of the classic problems with working from home for the first time is that everything becomes a blur, and you find yourself working crazily hard to try to prove to yourself and others that you aren’t slacking. Remember that in the office, you probably stop for tea or coffee, wander over to see colleagues for a chat – not just work-related – and sit down for a quiet lunch. Take time to do something similar when you’re working from home, and if you’re having video-conferences with colleagues, try to set some of the time on the call aside for non-work related conversations: if you are used to these sorts of conversations normally, and are missing them due to working at home, you need to consider whether there may be an impact on your emotional or mental health.

8 Exercise

Get up from where you are working, and go outside if you can. Walk around the room, get a drink of water – whatever it is you do, don’t stay sat down in front of a computer all day. It’s not just the exercise that you need – though it will be beneficial – but a slight change of scene to guard against the feeling that you are chained to your work, even when at home.

9 Stop

Another common pitfall for people who work from home is that they never stop. Once you allow your work into your home, the compartmentalisation of the two environments that most of us manage (most of the time, hopefully) can fall away, and it’s very easy just to “pop back to the computer for a couple of emails” after supper, only to find yourself working away at a complex spreadsheet some two and a half hours later. Compartmentalising is a key skill when working from home, and one to put into your daily routine as much as possible.

Finally…

It’s likely that you won’t manage to keep to all of the above, at least not all of the time. That’s fine: don’t beat yourself up about it, and try to start each day afresh, with plans to abide by as many of the behaviours above as you can manage. When things don’t work, accept that, plan to improve or mitigate them next time, and move on. Remember: it is in your employer’s best interests that you work as sensibly and sustainably as possible, so looking after yourself and setting up routines and repeatable practices that keep you well and productive is good for everybody.


1 – I know this sounds impossible with small kids – believe me, I’ve been there on occasion. Do your best, and, again ensure that your colleagues (and manager!) understand any constraints you have.

5 resolutions for travellers in 2020

Enjoy the time when you’re not travelling

I’m not a big one for New Year[1] resolutions.  To give you an example, my resolution for 2019 was “not to be mocked by my wife or daughters”.  Given that one of them (my daughters, that is) is a teenager, and the other nearly so, this went about as well as you might expect.  At the beginning of 2018, I wrote a blog post with the top 5 resolutions for security folks.  However, if I re-use the same ones this time round, somebody’s bound to notice[2], so I’m going to come up with some different ones[3].  I do quite a lot of travel, so I thought I’d provide my top 5 resolutions for this year, which I hope will be useful not only for me, but also others.

(I’ve written another article that covers in more depth some of the self-care aspects of this topic which you may find helpful: Of headphones, caffeine and self-care.)

1. Travel lighter

For business trips, I’ve tended to pack a big, heavy laptop, with a big, heavy power “brick” and cable, and then lots of other charging-type cables of different sizes and lengths, and a number of different plugs to fit everything into.  Honestly, there’s just no need for much of it, so this year, I suggest that we all first take stock, and go through all of those cables and see which ones we actually need.  Maybe take one spare for each USB type, but no more.  And we only need the one plug – that nice multi-socket one with a couple of USB sockets will do fine.  And if we lose it or forget it, the hotel will probably have one we can borrow, or we can get one as we go through the next airport.

And the laptop?  Well, I’ve just got a little Chromebook.  There are a variety of these: I managed to pick up a Pixelbook second-hand, with warranty, for about 40% off, and I love it.  I’m pretty sure that I can use it for all the day-to-day tasks I need to perform while travelling, and, as a bonus, the power connection is smaller and lighter than the one for my laptop.  I’ve picked up a port extender (2 x USB C, 1 x USB A, 1 x Ethernet, 1 x HDMI), and I think I’m sorted.  I’m going to try leaving the big laptop at home, and see what happens.

2. Take time

I’m not just talking about leaving early to get to the airport – though that is my standard practice – but also about just, well, taking more time about things.  It’s easy to rush here and there, and work yourself into a state[3], or feel that you need to fill every second of every day with something work-related, when you wouldn’t do that if you were at home.  It may be stepping aside to let other people off the plane, and strolling to the ground transportation exit, rather than hurrying there, or maybe stopping for a few minutes to look at some street art or enjoy the local architecture – whatever it is, give yourself permission not to hurry and not to rush, but just breathe and let the rest of the world slip by, even if it’s just for a few seconds.

3. Look after yourself

Headphones are a key tool for help me look after myself – and one of the things I won’t be discarding as part of my “travel lighter” resolution.  Sometimes I need to take myself away from the hubbub and to chill.  But they are just a tool: I need to remember that I need to stop, and put them on, and listen to some music.  It’s really easy to get caught up in the day, and the self-importance of being the Business Traveller, and forget that I’m not superhuman (and that my colleagues don’t expect me to be).  Taking time is the starting point – and sometimes all you have time for – but at some point you need to stop completely and do something for yourself.

4. Remember you’re tired

Most of us get grumpy when we’re tired[4].  And travelling is tiring, so when you’re at the end of a long trip, or just at the beginning of one, after a long day in cars and airports and planes, remember that you’re tired, and try to act accordingly.  Smile.  Don’t be rude.  Realise that the hotel receptionist is doing their best to sort your room out, or that the person in front of you in the queue for a taxi is just as frustrated with their four children as you are (well, maybe not quite as much).  When you get home, your partner or spouse has probably been picking up the slack of all the things that you’d normally do at home, so don’t snap at them: be nice, show you care.  Whatever you’re doing, expect things to take longer: you’re not at the top of your game.  Oh, and restrict alcohol intake, and go to bed early instead.  Booze may feel like it’s going to help, but it’s really, really not.

5. Enjoy not travelling

My final resolution was going to be “take exercise”, and this still matters, but I decided that even more important is the advice to enjoy the time when you’re not travelling.  Without “down-time”, travelling becomes – for most of us at least – a heavier and heavier burden.  It’s so easy, on returning from a work trip, to head straight back into the world of emails and documents and meetings, maybe catching up over the weekend on those items that you didn’t get done because you were away.  Don’t do this – or do it very sparingly, and if you can, claw back the time over the next few days, maybe taking a little longer over a cup of tea or coffee, or stopping yourself from checking work emails one evening.  Spend time with the family[5], hang out with some friends, run a 5k, go to see a film/movie, play some video games, complete that model railway set-up you’ve been working on[7].  Whatever it is that you’re doing, let your mind and your body know that you’re not “on-the-go”, and that it’s time to recover some of that energy and be ready when the next trip starts.  And you know it will, so be refreshed, and be ready.


1 – I’m using the Western (Gregorian calendar), so this is timely.  If you’re using a different calendar, feel free to adjust.

2 – the list is literally right there if you follow the link.

3 – I considered reversing the order, but the middle one would just stay the same.

4 – I wondered if this is just me, but then remembered the stressed faces of those on aircraft, in airports and checking into hotels, and thought, “no, it’s not”.  And I am informed (frequently) by my family that this is definitely the case for me.

5 – if you have one[6].

6 – and if that’s actually a relaxing activity…

7 – don’t mock: it takes all kinds.

My 7 rules for remote-work sanity

If I need to get out of my office, I’ll take the dog for a walk

リモートワークをするときの7つのマイルール

I work remotely, and have done, on and off, for a good percentage of the past 10-15 years.  I’m lucky that I’m in a role where this suits my responsibilities, and in a company – Red Hat – that is set up for it.  Not all roles – those with many customer onsite meetings, or those with a major service component – are suited to remote working, of course, but it’s clear that an increasing number of organisations are considering having at least some of their workers doing so remotely.

I’ve carefully avoided using the phrase either “working from home” or “working at home” above.  I’ve seen discussion that the latter gives a better “vibe” for some reason, but it’s not accurate for many remote workers.  In fact, it doesn’t describe my role perfectly, either.  My role is remote, in that I have no company-provided “base” – with chair, desk, meeting rooms, phone, Internet access, etc. – but I don’t spend all of my time at home.  I spend maybe one and a half weeks a month, on average, travelling – to attend or speak at conferences, to have face-to-face (“F2F”) meetings, etc..  During these times, I’m generally expected to be contactable and to keep at least vaguely up-to-date on email – though the exact nature of the activities in which I’m engaged, and the urgency of the contacts and email, may increase or reduce my engagement.

Open source

One of the reasons that I can work remotely is that I work for a company that works with open source software.  I’m currently involved in a very exciting project called Enarx (which I first announced on this blog).  We have contributors in Europe and the US – and interest from further abroad.  Our stand-ups are all virtual, and we default to turning on video.  At least two of our regulars will participate from a treadmill, I will typically actually stand at my desk.  We use github for all of our code (it’s all open source, of course), and there’s basically no reason for us to meet in person very often.  We try to celebrate together – agreeing to get cake, wherever we are, to mark special occasions, for instance – and have laptop stickers to brand ourselves and help team unity. We have a shared chat, and IRC channel and spend a lot of time communicating via different channels.  We’re still quite a small team, but it works for now.  If you’re looking for more tips about how to manage, coordinate and work in remote teams, particularly around open source projects, you’ll find lots of information at the brilliant Opensource.com.

The environment

When I’m not travelling around the place, I’m based at home.  There, I have a commute – depending on weather conditions – of around 30-45 seconds, which is generally pretty bearable.  My office is separate from the rest of the house (set in the garden), and outfitted with an office chair, desk, laptop dock, monitor, webcam, phone, keyboard and printer: these are the obvious work-related items in the room.

Equally important, however, are the other accoutrements that make for a good working environment.  These will vary from person to person, but I also have:

  • a Sonos, attached to an amplifier and good speakers
  • a sofa, often occupied by my dog, and sometimes one of the cats
  • a bookshelf, where the books which aren’t littering the floor reside
  • tea-making facilities (I’m British – this is important)
  • a fridge, filled with milk (for the tea), beer and wine (don’t worry: I don’t drink these during work hours, and it’s more that the fridge is good for “overflow” from our main kitchen one)
  • wide-opening windows and blinds for the summer (we have no air-conditioning: I’m British, remember?)
  • underfloor heating and a wood-burning stove for the winter (the former to keep the room above freezing until I get the latter warmed up)
  • a “NUC” computer and monitor for activities that aren’t specifically work-related
  • a few spiders.

What you have will depend on your work style, but these “non-work-related” items are important (bar the spiders, possibly) to my comfort and work practice.  For instance, I often like to listen to music to help me concentrate; I often sit on the sofa with the dog/cats to read long documents; and without the fridge and tea-making facilities, I might as well be American[1].

My rules

How does it work, then?  Well, first of all, most of us like human contact from time to time.  Some remote workers will rent space in a shared work environment, and work there most of the time: they prefer an office environment, or don’t have a dedicated space for working a home.  Others will mainly work in coffee shops, or on their boat[2], or may spend half of the year in the office, and the other half working from a second home.  Whatever you do, finding something that works for you is important.  Here’s what I tend to do, and why:

  1. I try to have fairly rigid work hours – officially (and as advertised on our intranet for the information of colleagues), I work 10am-6pm UK time.  This gives me a good overlap with the US (where many of my colleagues are based), and time in the morning to go for a run or a cycle and/or to walk the dog (see below).  I don’t always manage these times, but when I flex in one direction, I attempt to pull some time back the other way, as otherwise I know that I’ll just work ridiculous hours.
  2. I ensure that I get up and have a cup of tea – in an office environment, I would typically be interrupted from time to time by conversations, invitations to get tea, phyiscal meetings in meeting rooms, lunch trips, etc..  This doesn’t happen at home, so it’s important to keep moving, or you’ll be stuck at your desk for 3-4 hours at a time, frequently.  This isn’t good for your health, and often, for your productivity (and I enjoy drinking tea).
  3. I have an app which tells me when I’ve been inactive – this is new for me, but I like it.  If I’ve basically not moved for an hour, my watch (could be phone or laptop) tells me to do some exercise.  It even suggests something, but I’ll often ignore that, and get up for some tea, for instance[3].
  4. I use my standing desk’s up/down capability – I try to vary my position through the day from standing to sitting and back again.  It’s good for posture, and keeps me more alert.
  5. I walk the dog – if I just need to get out of my office and do some deep thinking (or just escape a particularly painful email thread!), I’ll take the dog for a walk.  Even if I’m not thinking about work for all of the time, I know that it’ll make me more productive, and if it’s a longish walk, I’ll make sure that I compensate with extra time spent working (which is always easy).
  6. I have family rules – the family knows that when I’m in my office, I’m at work.  They can message me on my phone (which I may ignore), or may come to the window to see if I’m available, but if I’m not, I’m not.  Emergencies (lack of milk for tea, for example) can be negotiated on a case-by-case basis.
  7. I go for tea (and usually cake) at a cafe – sometimes, I need to get into a different environment, and have a chat with actual people.  For me, popping into the car for 10 minutes and going to a cafe is the way to do this.  I’ve found one which makes good cakes (and tea).

These rules don’t describe my complete practice, but they are an important summary of what I try to do, and what keeps me (relatively) sane.  Your rules will be different, but I think it’s really important to have rules, and to make it clear to yourself, your colleagues, your friends and your family, what they are.  Remote working is not always easy, and requires discipline – but that discipline is, more often than not, in giving yourself some slack, rather than making yourself sit down for eight hours a day.


1 – I realise that many people, including many of my readers, are American.  That’s fine: you be you.  I actively like tea, however (and know how to make it properly, which seems to be an issue when I visit).

2 – I know a couple of these: lucky, lucky people!

3 – can you spot a pattern?

First aid – are you ready?

Your using the defibrillator is the best chance that the patient has of surviving.

Disclaimer: I am not a doctor, nor a medical professional. I will attempt not to give specific medical or legal advice in this article: please check your local medical and legal professionals before embarking on any course of action about which you are unsure.

This is, generally, a blog about security – that is, information security or cybersecurity – but I sometimes blog about other things. This is one of those articles. It’s still about security, if you will – the security and safety of those around you. Here’s how it came about: I recently saw a video on LinkedIn about a restaurant manager performing Abdominal Thrusts (it’s not called the Heimlich Manoeuvre any more due to trademarking) on a choking customer, quite possibly saving his life.

And I thought: I’ve done that.

And then I thought: I’ve performed CPR, and used a defibrillator, and looked after people who were drunk or concussed, and helped people having a diabetic episode, and encouraged a father to apply an epipen[1] to a confused child suffering from anaphylactic shock, and comforted a schoolchild who had just had an epileptic fit, and attended people in more than one car crash (typically referred to as an “RTC”, or “Road Traffic Collision” in the UK these days[2]).

And then I thought: I should tell people about these stories. Not to boast[3], but because if you travel a lot, or you commute to work, or you have a family, or you work in an office, or you ever go out to a party, or you play sports, or engage in hobby activities, or get on a plane or train or boat or drive anywhere, then there’s a decent chance that you may come across someone who needs your help, and it’s good – very good – if you can offer them some aid. It’s called “First Aid” for a reason: you’re not expected to know everything, or fix everything, but you’re the first person there who can provide aid, and that’s the best the patient can expect until professionals arrive.

Types of training

There are a variety of levels of first aid training that might be appropriate for you. These include:

  • family and children focussed;
  • workplace first aid;
  • hobby, sports and event first aid;
  • ambulance and local health service support and volunteering.

There’s an overlap between all of these, of course, and what you’re interested in, and what’s available to you, will vary based on your circumstances and location. There may be other constraints such as age and physical ability or criminal background checks: these will definitely be dependent on your location and individual context.

I’m what’s called, in the UK, a Community First Responder (CFR). We’re given some specific training to help provide emergency first aid in our communities. What exactly you do depends on your local ambulance trust – I’m with the East of England Ambulance Service Trust, and I have a kit with items to allow basic diagnosis and treatment which includes:

  • a defibrillator (AED) and associated pads, razors[4], shears, etc.
  • a tank of oxygen and various masks
  • some airway management equipment whose name I can never remember
  • glucogel for diabetic treatment
  • a pulsoximeter for heartrate and blood oxygen saturation measurement
  • gloves
  • bandages, plasters[6]
  • lots of forms to fill in
  • some other bits and pieces.

I also have a phone and a radio (not all CFRs get a radio, but our area is rural and has particularly bad mobile phone reception.

I’m on duty as I type this – I work from home, and my employer (the lovely Red Hat) is cool with my attending emergency calls in certain circumstances – and could be called out at any moment to an emergency in about a 10 mile/15km radius. Among the call-outs I’ve attended are cardiac arrests (“heart attacks”), fits, anaphylaxis (extreme allergic reactions), strokes, falls, diabetics with problems, drunks with problems, major bleeding, patients with difficulty breathing or chest pains, sepsis, and lots of stuff which is less serious (and which has maybe been misreported). The plan is that if it’s considered a serious condition, it looks like I can get there before an ambulance, or if the crew is likely to need more hands to help (for treating a full cardiac arrest, a good number of people can really help), then I get dispatched. I drive my own car, I’m not allowed sirens or lights, I’m not allowed to break the speed limit or go through red lights and I don’t attend road traffic collisions. I volunteer whatever hours fit around my job and broader life, I don’t get paid, and I provide my own fuel and vehicle insurance. I get anywhere from zero to four calls a day (but most often zero or one).

There are volunteers in other fields who attend events, provide sports or hobby first aid (I did some scuba diving training a while ago), and there are all sorts of types of training for workplace first aid. Most workplaces will have designated first aiders who can be called on if there’s a problem.

The minimum to know

The people I’ve just noted above – the trained ones – won’t always be available. Sometimes, you – with no training – will be the first on scene. In most jurisdictions, if you attempt first aid, the law will look kindly on you, even if you don’t get it all perfect[7]. In some jurisdictions, there’s actually an expectation that you’ll step in. What should you know? What should you do?

Here’s my view. It’s not the view of a professional, and it doesn’t take into account everybody’s circumstances. Again, it’s my view, and it’s that you should consider enough training to be able to cope with two of the most common – and serious – medical emergencies.

  1. Everybody should know how to deal with a choking patient.
  2. Everybody should know how do to CPR (Cardiopulmonary resuscitation) – chest compressions, at minimum, but with artificial respiration if you feel confident.

In the first of these cases, if someone is choking, and they continue to fail to breathe, they will die.

In the second of these cases, if someone’s heart has stopped beating, they are dead. Doing nothing means that they stay that way. Doing something gives them a chance.

There are videos and training available on the Internet, or provided by many organisations.

The minimum to try

If you come across somebody who is in cardiac arrest, call the emergency services. Dispatch someone (if you’re not alone) to try to find a defibrillator (AED) – the emergency services call centre will often help with this, or there’s an app called “GoodSam” which will locate one for you.

Use the defibrillator.

They are designed for untrained people. You open it up, and it will talk to you. Do what it says.

Even if you don’t feel confident giving CPR, use a defibrillator.

I have used a defibrillator. They are easy to use.

Use that defibrillator.

The defibrillator is not the best chance that the patient has of surviving: your using the defibrillator is the best chance that the patient has of surviving.

Conclusion

Providing first aid for someone in a serious situation doesn’t always work. Sometimes people die. In fact, in the case of a cardiac arrest (heart attack), the percentage of times that CPR is successful is low – even in a hospital setting, with professionals on hand. If you have tried, you’ve given them a chance. It is not your fault if the outcome isn’t perfect. But if you hadn’t tried, there was no chance.

Please respect and support professionals, as well. They are often busy and concerned, and may not have the time to thank you, but your help is appreciated. We are lucky, in our area, that the huge majority of EEAST ambulance personnel are very supportive of CFRs and others who help out in an emergency.

If this article has been interesting to you, and you are considering taking some training, then get to the end of the post, share it via social media(!), and then search online for something appropriate to you. There are many organisations who will provide training – some for free – and many opportunities for volunteering. You know that if a member of your family needed help, you would hope that somebody was capable and willing to provide it.

Final note – if you have been affected by anything in this article, please find some help, whether professional or just with friends. Many of the medical issues I’ve discussed are distressing, and self care is important (it’s one of the things that EEAST takes seriously for all its members, including its CFRs).


1 – a special adrenaline-administering device (don’t use somebody else’s – they’re calibrated pretty carefully to an individual).

2 – calling it an “accident” suggests it was no-one’s fault, when often, it really was.

3 – well, maybe a little bit.

4 – to shave hairy chests – no, really.

5 – to cut through clothing. And nipples chains, if required. Again, no, really.

6 – “Bandaids” for our US cousins.

7 – please check your local jurisdiction’s rules on this.

Of headphones, caffeine and self-care

Being honest about being down.

I travel quite a lot with my job.  This is fine, and what I signed up for, and mitigated significantly by the fact that I work from home the rest of the time, which means that (video-calls permitting) I can pop down to see the kids when they get back from school, or share a dog walk with my wife if she’s at home as well.  The travel isn’t as easy as it was a couple of decades ago: I’d like to believe that this is because my trips are more frequent, and often longer, but suspect that it’s more to do with the passage of time on my body.  There’s more than just the wear and tear, however, and I think it’s worth talking about it, but I’m sure it’s not just me.

I sometimes get down.

I sometimes get sad.

I sometimes get peeved, and cross, and angry for little or no reason.

I’ve never been diagnosed with any mental illness, and I don’t feel the need to medicalise what I’m describing, but I do need to own it: it’s not me at my best, I’m not going to be able to perform my job to the best of my ability, and it’s not healthy.  I know that it’s worse when I’m travelling, because I’m away from my family, the dog and the cats, divorced from routine and, given that I tend to travel to North America quite frequently, somewhat jet-lagged.  None of these things are specific triggers, and it’s not even that they are necessarily part of the cause, but they can all make it more difficult to achieve and even keel again.

I wanted to write about this subject because I had a day when I had what I think of as “a bit of a wobble”[1] a couple of weeks ago while travelling.  On this particular occasion, I managed to step back a bit, and even did some reading around the web for suggestions about what to do.  There were a few good blog articles, but I thought it would be honest to my – and others’ – lived experience to talk about it here, and talk about what works and what doesn’t.

Before we go any further, however, I’d like to make a few things clear.

First: if you are having suicidal thoughts, seek help.  Now.  You are valued, you do have worth, but I am not an expert, and you need to seek the help of an expert.  Please do.

Second: I am not an expert in mental health, depression or other such issues.  These are some thoughts about what helps me.  If you have feelings and thoughts that disturb you or are having a negative impact on you or those around you, seek help.  There should be no stigma either to mental illness or to seeking help to battle it.

Third: if you know someone who is suffering from mental illness of any kind, try to be supportive, try to be kind, try to be understanding.  It is hard.  I know people – and love people – with mental health issues.  Help to support them in getting help for themselves, if that’s what they need you to do, and consider getting help for yourself, too.

 

Things that do and don’t work (for me)

Alcohol (and over-eating) – NO

One article I read pointed out that having a few drinks or eating a tub of ice cream when you’re travelling and feeling down “because you deserve it” isn’t self-care: it’s self-medication.  I like this dictum.  Alcohol, though a dis-inhibitor, is also a depressant, and even if it makes you feel better for a while, you’re not going to be thanking last-night-you for the hangover you have in the morning.  Particularly if you’ve got a meeting or presentation in the morning.

Exercise – YES

I never used to bother much with exercise, particularly when I was travelling.  But the years have taken their toll, and now I try to hit the gym when I’m staying in a hotel, maybe every other day.  However, I also find that there are often opportunities to walk to meetings instead of taking a taxi, or maybe making my own way to a restaurant in the evening, even if I catch a cab back.  I track the steps I do, and aim for 10,000 a day.  This can be difficult when you’re in a meeting all day, but little things like taking the stairs, not the lift (elevator) can get you closer to your goal.

If you have a free day in a city, particularly at the weekend, do a search for “walking tours”.  I’ve done a few of these, particularly food-based ones, where you get to stretch your legs whilst being given a tour of the sites and trying some local cuisine.  You also get to meet some people, which can be good.

People – YES and NO

Sometimes what I need to pull myself out of a gloomy mood is to spend some time with people.  Even if it’s just on the edges of a conversation, not engaging too much, being around people I know and value can be a positive thing.

On other occasions, it’s exactly the opposite of what I need, and I crave solitude.  On occasion, I won’t know until I turn up for dinner, say, that I’m really not in the right head-space for company.  I’ve found that if you plead jet-lag, colleagues are generally very understanding, and if there’s a loud-mouthed colleague who is very insistent that you stay and join in, find a quieter colleague and explain that you need to get back to the hotel early.

Reading – YES

Books are great to escape to.  Whether you carry a paperback in your laptop bag, have a Kindle (or other e-reader) or just read something that you’ve downloaded onto your phone, you can go “somewhere else” for a bit.  I find that having a physical book is helpful, or at least using an e-reader, as then you’re slightly protected from the temptation to check that email that’s just come in.

Headphones – YES

What did we do before headphones?  I try keep a set in my pocket wherever I’m going and connect my phone when I get a chance.  I may wander the floor of an Expo with music on, sit down with some music for a cup of tea (of which more below) in a five minute break during a meeting, or wait for a session to start with something soothing in my ears.  In fact, it doesn’t need to be soothing: I can be in the mood for classical, upbeat, loud, quiet, downbeat, indie, New Orleans jazz, bluegrass[2] or folk[3]. That’s one of the joys of having music available at pretty much all times now.  Insulating myself from the world and allowing myself to take a metaphorical breath before rejoining it, can make a big difference.

Caffeine – YES (with care)

I don’t drink coffee (I just don’t like the taste), but I do drink tea.  It can be difficult to find a good cup of tea in North America[4], but I’ve discovered that when I can source one, the very act of sitting down and drinking it grounds me.  Smell and taste are such important senses for us, and I associate the smell and taste of tea so strongly with home and safety that a good cup of tea can do wonders for me.  That said, if I drink too much tea, I can get cranky (not to mention the fact that it’s a diuretic), and then I miss it if I can’t get it, so there’s a balance there.

Breathing – YES

Breathing is helpful, obviously.  If you don’t breathe, you’re going to die[5], but there’s a real power to stopping what you’re doing, and taking a few deep, purposeful breaths.  I’m sure there’s lots of science (and probably pseudo-science) around this, but try it: it can be really fantastic.

Conclusion

I know that I’m not alone in finding life difficult sometimes when I travel.  Please look after yourself and find whatever actions which help you.  My intention with this article isn’t to provide fixes for other people, but more to share a few things that help me, and most important, to acknowledge the problem.  If we do this, we can recognise the need for action in ourselves, but also for support in our family, friends and colleagues, too.

Last: if you become ill – physically, emotionally or mentally – you are not going to be functioning as well as you might when well.  It is in your and you organisation’s best interests for you to be well and healthy.  Many companies, organisations and unions provide (often free) help for those who are struggling.  If you keep experiencing feelings such as those described in this article, or you are in acute need, please seek professional help.


1 – because I’m British, and that’s the sort of language I use.

2 – one of my little guilty pleasures.

3 – another.

4 – you need decent tea to start with, and boiling or just off-boiling water: that’s close to 100C, or 212F.

5 – I’m not a medical expert, but I know that.